I’m so shy. How do I possibly open up to a coach?

Ah, the introvert. The person who thrives on aloneness, who chooses to place their focus on their internal feelings rather than external stimulation sources. The person who stays quiet, reserved and introspective, who enjoys smaller groups to large ones. The person who is self-aware and tries to find the answers within.

Is this person you?

Can you successfully create a relationship with a coach, especially if you’re the type to try to figure things out on your own?

Perhaps you’re more than an introvert. Perhaps you’re also shy, or suffer from some social anxiety. Perhaps the idea of opening up to another human being about your desires, your hopes, and your challenges is making you want to throw up a little bit. 

Here’s some comfort: up to 50% of the population is estimated to be introverted! Many people are intimidated or overstimulated by large crowds. Many people like to think for a long time before they open their mouths to speak. Many feel drained by participating in group projects or social gatherings — they feel like they need to “recharge” after such activities by spending time alone. 

The good news is that many shy people benefit from coaching in more ways than one.

Let’s start with the fact that coaching is often a one on one relationship; although group coaching is available, you have the option to spend time with one other person in an intimate, confidential setting, where you can share details about yourself that you know won’t ever leave the room. There are so many coaches ready and waiting to help you that you can choose exactly who and what kind of coach you want to work with, and you can request that their services be tailored to your comfort level. 

Second, if you’re the type of person who doesn’t really like small talk (like many introverts and shy people), rest assured that because your coaching sessions are probably one hour at a time, your coach will appreciate it if you want to “cut to the chase,” and get right to what you want to converse about. Many introverts spend a lot of time thinking deeply about their concerns and circumstances, but typically don’t spend the same amount of time or energy mulling it over out loud. By already being in touch with your feelings, and being able to vocalize them, your coach will help you access even deeper feelings and guide you toward further inner work that you’ll likely enjoy doing — on your own! 

If you’re the type who likes to set your own schedule, then coaching really is perfect for you. Although coaches act as guides, they’re really there to facilitate soul-searching conversations with yourself; your vision, your mission and your goals are made on your own time. In your own way. 

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